What is your dress telling people? Pastor Lawrence

       I verify every picture that is on this website, and it is always interesting to see the pictures that  I get.   One picture that I got this last month was very immodest.   And I e-mailed her and quoted my Dad which use to always tell my sister, “what it takes to get a man is what it takes to keep a man.”   Another words if you try to be sexy and attract guys through the body then they will not love you because of who are, but will only lust after you.  Sadly most women try to dress sexy to get a man to love her and ultimately marry her.  If drawn only to the body, then most men will only stay with you until they get what they want (sex) or till something else comes around that is better.  But a man who is attracted to who you are and not the body, then they will love you in the good days and in the bad.  And if he is the right kind of guy eventually marry you.

The Bible commands that women should wear modest clothing and in I Timothy 2:9 says, “In like manner also, that women adorn (put on) themselves in modest apparel (clothing).   This is saying that women should not wear clothing that draws attention to the body.  It is common knowledge that men are aroused by sight.  And the dress is the langage of thought to a man.  What is in your heart will come out in your dress.  You are telling a man that you are cheap and easy if you dress immodestly.  And even though you get his attention, it will be the wrong kind .   The nurse of infidelity is sensuality.  And it is a sin before all might God for you to arouse the wrong desires in men.

     There are certain common mistakes women wear in arousing the wrong desires in men.  Let me share some with you, that you will not give off the wrong message to men. 

1.   Tight Clothing.   So much of what is wrong in women dress is not shown, but it is suggested.  Things like tight sweater, tight blouses, or skirts that are tight is wrong.   Tight clothing that shows the entire figure of a women will definitely arouse the wrong desires in a man.  God has given you to one man and it is sin to show off what is not yours.  It is a type of adultery.  And you will regret it someday.

2.    Short skirts.  The mininum all ladies dress or skirts length should go to the bottom of the knees.   The Bible teaches that it is nakedness for men or women to reveal there thighs.  The Bible teaches in Exodus 28:42 says, “to cover their nakedness; from the loins even unto the thighs they shall reach.”  He we have the Lord tell Moses that it is wrong for the priest to show there thighs, because it would be nakedness.  And the shorter you make your dress ladies the more of the wrong attention you will receive.  And if you have every dress or skirt length you own be to the bottom of the knee, then it still will be on the border line of doing wrong.  Because you can sit down and cross your legs, and the it can arise and show the thighs still.  It is safe to wear all outfits to the middle of the calf.     You probable look at the out fit and think how pretty it is, but that is not what men are going to think.  And this applies also to shorts.  Please don’t think I am mad at any lady, but I just don’t want a men imagining sleeping with you in there mind.  And they will if you dress immodestly.

3.  A Plunging neck line.  Things like halter tops, and plunging neck lines that show part of your breast is a sin.  God wants you to be pure, and the nurse of infidelity is sensuality.  God wants you to be modest in all your clothing.  And most mens eyes will drift down when you are advertising your body to men.  And the sad thing is that men don’t respect a dirt women.  What men want to marry is a clean and pure girl that has saved herself for her husband someday.  So if you are a clean and pure girl don’t advertise what you are not!!

     So what is your dress telling people about you?   Is it saying that you are easy, and would be willing to go to bed with the right guy.  Or does it say that you are a clean , pure, and a christian girl that is saving her self .     My goal is not you hurt any women, but a desire for women to be treated as a lady and the greatest creation God has ever made.  Be pure on the inside and on the outside.  Just a thought.

Is God in Control? (Breaking Up) By Pastor Lawrence

    It is a rare person that has never experienced this.  At first there seems so much promise, and they are so wonderful.  And people tell you that you look great together.  But after a while for some reason they don’t want to date you anymore.  Many have cried and asked God “why?”   Today I want to give you some thoughts about how to handle a break up.

      The first thing I want you to always remember is that God is in control.  Nothing happens without God allowing it.  Always remember that God loves you.  The Bible says in Revelation 3:7 says, “he (Jesus) that openeth, and no man shutteth; and shutteth, and no man openeth.”  God is always in control and he could of closed the door on this relationship.  He could have saved the relationship, but he might have something better for you.  As the old saying goes, “God leaves the best to those that leave the choice up to him.”  Be willing to let go any relationship, understanding that it is God that gives someone and he is totally capable of bring him/her back.  If it is his will.  Trust God.  And holding on to someone to tight is one of the major reason why someone breaks up with another.  Besides showing a girl/guy that you’re desperate for her, there is things you can say after the break up that will kill all chance of having them come back.  Here are some.

-Repeatedly telling him/her that you love them.

-Calling them non-stop to check up on them

-Asking (or begging) him/her to give you another chance.

-Telling him/her that they are “the one”, and that you can’t live without her.

-Letting him/her know that you love her and will always be there for them. 

     Sadly the consequences is that it pushes them father away, and it reassures them that they made the right decision to end this relationship.  They fell in love with a confident and and independent person.  They want to be with the person they met, not the person that you’ve become.  Nothing a person hates more than to be needed.  Being dependant on another is the surest way to kill a relationship.   And that person who needs the other the least will always be in control of the relationship. 

     Many dating books will promise ways to get them back, and even play mind games on them.   But in  Isaiah 55:8 says, “my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways”, and the way to save a relationship is to let them go and trusting God.   If it is his will he will bring them back and if not he will bring something better.  Just a thought!

Comman Sense Advice By Pastor Jackson

Everyone is on this site to find someone.  And your dream to find love has taken you to Internet Dating.  But there is I want to share with you as you contact and meet people on this site.

1   Be cautious sharing personal information.   It is impossible for any dating website to guarantee that everyone on the site is good God fearing Christians.  So it is my advice not to give to much personal information at first.  Try to ask alot of questions and see if this person his heading in the same direction and have the same core values as you do.

2.   Do your own research.  After a while do a background check on someone.  Sadly there has been horrible stories I have heard about someone meeting somebody on the Internet.  And we all have heard about them.  And you are totally responsible for your actions and not In His Time or any other dating website. 

3.  Be slow in your dating.  I recommend that you call his Preacher and ask what he knows about him.  I also recommend that you have a dating counselor.  Someone that is older and wiser than you that could see things that you don’t as a single person.  A good person would be your Pastor, if your Father is around, or a wise counselor in your church that you respect and would be willing to talk honestly about the relationship.  But remember who ever you choose give them veto power in your dating relationship.  When you meet that person I would recommend that you don’t go alone.  Bring someone with you and meet in a public place.  If the person ever tries to get you to meet him/her at a hotel or some private place, then forget that person as a possible dating partner and future mate.  If they want to get physical with you don’t fool your self in thinking that it is love.  It is lust and they probable  messed around with some before you and will mess around with someone after you.  A good person to bring with you  is someone of the same gender as the person you are meeting.

     These a some common sense advice I would give any of my church members or child, and it applies to any age.  You can never be to careful.